Offering a uniquely Australian perspective on the US Presidential election

All Present And Correct

All Present And Correct

Friday 25 November, 2016
Fred Plodge, spiritual leader of the public bar political movement, explains why his party’s policies will transcend even those of Trump in the coming era beyond political correctness.
The story starts here...

Tpublic-bar-politicshe US Presidential election has been of incalculable assistance in helping me finesse the future policies of the Public Bar Party.

Hillary arguably ran the crappiest campaign in modern political history. Who on earth was the braindead boofhead who came up with the campaign slogan ‘Stronger Together” for the second most unpopular Presidential candidate in history?

What Hillary singularly failed to realise was that half of America had long ago determined that political correctness is a more dangerous addiction than ecstasy and Trump is the only known antidote.

Racism, gender equality, gay marriage and refugees had all enjoyed an extended period of growth so it wasn’t surprising that they’d already lost momentum amongst the American people. This same cultural evolution however happened in our public bars some time ago.

In the not too distant past women were banned from public bars but today they’re all treated there just like one of the boys.

There was a time when no landlord would even dream of offering a foreign beer in an Aussie public bar especially that warm Pommie piss. Today’s public bar patrons can enjoy beers from all over the world but our landlord remains cognisant of the potential effect of Pommie beer on global warming.

If America had kept up with the social reform in Aussie public bars all this politically correct mumbo-jumbo they carry on with would have been over years ago and Trump would have stood even less chance of becoming President than Jeb Bush as a greenie.

And if Section 18c had ever been applied to free speech in our public bars Gillian Triggs would have ensured the perpetrators spent more time in court than in pubs.

And where do the forgotten people of Australia go to ensure someone remembers them when they’ve been forgotten by all the politicians? Why public bars of course.

This is why the Public Bar Party is destined to become such a powerful force in Australian politics. We’re already way ahead of Trumpism in the post political correctness social evolution.

And now I hear the politically correct are campaigning for the removal of national borders to facilitate free movement between countries. The Public Bar Party will be vehemently opposed to that policy because we’re only too aware of the overcrowding and lack of social harmony in public bars offering superior entitlements like free trays of nuts, cheap beer and strip shows.

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About this Series
Fred Plodge is widely acclaimed as Australia’s premier pub commentator on politics and international affairs. Pub patrons throughout Sydney look to Fred as their most unfailingly reliable source of current affairs commentary. Fred’s insight seems to reach full potential after around six schooners and this has led to a feeling amongst patrons that by comparison the commentary from most politicians falls a few schooners short.

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