Offering a uniquely Australian perspective on the US Presidential election

Yaps from Bo and Big O

Saving What’s Left in the Senate

Saving What’s Left in the Senate

Friday 17 October, 2014
Read about the heroic efforts of Bo & Big O to keep the Senate out of the clutches of Tea Party Terrorists.
The story starts here...

bo-and-big-o

Yap No. 95

‘Now look Bo’ said Big O ‘we’re facing a threat to the very essence of American civilisation’

‘Oh you mean ISIL’ I said

‘No of course not’ said Big O ‘I mean the likelihood that the Republicans will gain control of the Senate in November’

‘Don’t let’s get carried away’ I said ‘you’re not going to lose your majority in the White House and if the barbarians do gain control of both Houses you can render them impotent through your veto’

‘Yes I know’ said Big O ‘but I’ll look even more like a lame duck president than I do already. People are surprised when they see me walking normally rather than waddling with a limp’

‘You could always issue some executive orders’ I said

‘That’s true’ said Big O ‘but it really pisses Congress off. They’re scared of becoming either recumbent, refulgent or redundant’

‘Ok’ I said ‘if you’re determined to help the Democrats hang on you’ve got to pull off something really dramatic in a hurry’

‘Like what?’ asked Big O

‘Like a demonstration that you’re in charge’ I replied ‘and the public can trust you to do the right thing’

‘I’m not sure I can suddenly change my style as radically as that’ said Big O

‘Of course you can’ I said ‘for example you could parachute a couple of divisions into Iraq and Syria and wipe out ISIL’

‘Look’ said Big O ‘I’m not comfortable with that. Wars are just not my thing. I’m ok with bombing as long as the other side doesn’t do anything unpleasant like shooting us down’

‘Here’s another great idea then’ I said ‘you could close the Southern Border’

‘Are you kidding?’ exclaimed Big O ‘If I did that I’d lose the Hispanic vote and millions of Americans would lose their unemployment entitlements because they’d have to do the crappy low paid jobs that the illegals have been suffering’

‘I know’ I said ‘you could tell Putin to get stuffed and send in the marines to kidnap Edward Snowden’

‘That’s too dangerous’ said Big O ‘it might spark another series of Snowden leaks about my dirty tricks campaign against Romney when I claimed that the Mormons were an off-shoot of the Taliban’

‘Ok’ I said ‘here comes the killer idea. Change Obamacare yet again to guarantee that no-one pays more for health insurance than they did before you introduced it’

‘I couldn’t possibly do that’ said Big O ‘it would adulterate the priceless legacy I’m leaving the nation’

‘Big O’ I said ‘I don’t think you need fear a lame duck presidency for the next two years. It’s shaping up as much more like a stuffed parrot’

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About this Series
Bo is the first canine to achieve a Senior Adviser position with a US President. He is responsible for many of the leading dogtrines of the Obama administration, is a leading expert on animal welfare and is adept at dealing with people who are absolutely barking. He is currently working on Obamacare for pets and has been selected to attend the next G20 meeting to pee over Putin’s shoe. Without Bo at his side Obama wouldn’t stand a dog’s chance.

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