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The Weak in Politics

Is Campbell a Trailblazer for Tony?

Is Campbell a Trailblazer for Tony?

Friday 6 February, 2015
Clive is blaming his poor election results in Queensland on Tony. At last he’s found something to agree with Campbell Newman about.
The story starts here...

Weak in Politics section from FridayMash

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In the wake of the Queensland election what is the future for the Palmer United Party?
– A miner party in the Northern Territory
– Retirement to a political rest home
– Listing of its leader in the AFR’s list of the 50 Most Impoverished Australians
– Proprietors of one Queensland’s largest attractions ‘The Big Clive
– A major feature at Clive’s Dinosaur Park

Heard down the Canberra corridors of power

‘Did Tony consult you before he knighted the Prince?’
‘No but a few weeks back I told him his government desperately needed a fillip’

I want to be absolutely clear about this

Surely Campbell Newman couldn’t have achieved the election disaster in Queensland all by himself. He must have had the help of some outsider like Tony.

Heard down the Queensland corridors of power

‘Aren’t you concerned that the new premier doesn’t know the GST rate?’
‘What’s the GST?’

Green and bear it

The Greens are concerned that Tony’s decision to knight Prince Philip puts their status as the nation’s most pea-brained politicians under threat. In response they’ve thought to be considering legislation to grant Bob Brown the honorary status of a tree.

Heard down the Canberra corridors of power

‘Why on earth do you think Rupert wants to get Peta fired?’
‘He thinks Tony would do a better job of running the country’

Conniving with Clive

Clive is blaming his poor election results in Queensland on Tony. At last he’s found something to agree with Campbell Newman about.

Heard down the NSW corridors of power

‘Tony says he’s received a request to come and take part in the state election campaign’
‘It must have come from Luke Foley’

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About this Series
This is the column with insights that all the other publications seem unable to cope with. That’s arguably because they take politics far too seriously.

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