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Ravings of a Ratbag

The Luce Scruz International Predictions for 2015

The Luce Scruz International Predictions for 2015

Friday 2 January, 2015
Friday Mash’s renowned international editor at large is predicting that everything will heat up globally in 2015 except the temperature.
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Ravings of a Ratbag - a new musing from FridayMash

Friday Mash’s renowned international editor at large is predicting that everything will heat up globally in 2015 except the temperature.

  • Putin will announce that MK17 was brought down by a drone controlled from the White House
  • Greece will be officially declared an economic basket-case by the World Bank and will receive a letter of congratulations from the Australian Senate
  • The Climate Change Conference in Paris could release enough hot air to start the world warming up again
  • President Assad will win the Nobel Peace Award for his heroic efforts in fighting ISIL
  • The Australian dollar will fall to the point where jihadists can’t afford to travel to Syria
  • Hollywood will do a re-make of The Interview starring Kim Jong-un as himself
  • China will clarify that from 2030 they’ll still be emitting increased amounts of carbon but in fewer emissions
  • Following an in-depth study of Ukraine’s economy the EU will recommend it re-joins Russia
  • The Scottish Nationalist Party’s main policy in the UK election will be a name change for England, Wales and Northern Ireland to Scotland
  • During Hillary’s campaign for President Bill will reprise Martin Luther King’s speech ‘I had a dream’ and Monica Lewinsky will claim the it was her
  • The world will turn on terrorism only when it becomes apparent it is responsible for more carbon emissions than the US
  • Anti-EU sentiment will continue to grow in the UK despite warnings that a premature withdrawal in Brussels could lead to an unfortunate climax in the UK
  • David Cameron will be returned as PM at the 2015 UK elections following news that baby George will follow in his footsteps at Eton and the promise that Nigel Farage will become Minister for Immigration.
  • Despite objections from Israel the rest of the world will awaken to the benefits of the Middle East as a perpetual war zone where they can send all their misfits and jihadists
  • Obama will finally succeed in his plan to make China the world’s biggest economy

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About this Series
In order to demonstrate our absolute commitment to free speech Friday Mash is even prepared to publish the extreme Ratbag Ravings of someone as nutty as Luce Scruz. She is one of the world’s leading correspondents at large because no-one will allow her to stay in one place for too long.

View all articles in the The Ravings of a Ratbag Series
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