Offering a uniquely Australian perspective on the US Presidential election

Maintaining The Rage

Maintaining The Rage

Friday 10 February, 2017
Trump and his team are worried at the prospect of him losing his capacity to abuse and outrage and becoming just like any other politician.  “Look” said Trump at a meeting of his inner circle “I’m concerned that there are millions of Americans whom I haven’t outraged yet” “What you have to understand Donald” said […]
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Trump and his team are worried at the prospect of him losing his capacity to abuse and outrage and becoming just like any other politician.

 “Look” said Trump at a meeting of his inner circle “I’m concerned that there are millions of Americans whom I haven’t outraged yet”

“What you have to understand Donald” said Kellyanne soothingly “is that it’s actually preferable not to outrage your own supporters so long as you maintain the rage amongst Hillary’s supporters, Bernie’s loony left, inhabitants of the Washington swamp and CNN”

“You mean my own supporters prefer it when I upset other people?” queried Trump “and ignore them?”

“Exactly” replied Kellyanne “it’s a key part of your innate appeal”

“I don’t feel as though I’ve done enough to upset China” confided Trump “or the EU although I’ve had some success with Australia and Mexico”

“I wouldn’t get too concerned” said Kellyanne reassuringly “you’ve got a trade war with China scheduled in a couple of months and you’re due to cause a furore during the upcoming elections in France and the Netherlands by supporting Marine Le Pen and Gert Wilders. On top of that you’re scheduled to become the number one cheerleader for Brexit so that will ensure your continuing notoriety across the entire EU”

“That’s a relief” exclaimed Trump “it’s essential I keep the dogs barking”

“Woof woof” commented Mad Dog “woof”

“I can’t help feeling” confessed Steve “that maintaining universal outrage at you at the required level demands invading somewhere. I’d recommend Cuba because it would be a neat way of repudiating another of Obama’s foreign policy follies”

“What do you think Reince?” asked Trump

“I couldn’t agree more” concurred Reince “and I’m very enthusiastic about the concept of illegal immigrants building the wall on their way back south of the border”

“I can’t help feeling” announced Kellyanne “that much of the outrage you are generating is a reaction to you keeping your election promises. People don’t feel comfortable with it because it’s never happened before”

“It goes much deeper than that” said Trump profoundly “I’ve created an entirely new supportive form of outrage only available to a President who understands that people’s sensitivities are irrelevant”

“I agree” affirmed Kellyanne “and I’m convinced that it’s only a matter of time before your Presidency becomes established on a much firmer footing”

“That’s one of the major advantages” pointed out Trump “of draining the swamp”

 

 

 

 

 

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