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Dick Head Interviews

Overbalancing at the ABC

Overbalancing at the ABC

Friday 5 May, 2017
Dick does a fair and balanced interview with the Managing Director of the ABC Michelle Guthrie although that could be interpreted as a biased view.
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Dick does a fair and balanced interview with the Managing Director of the ABC Michelle Guthrie although that could be interpreted as a biased view.

“Now look Michelle” began Dick “surely you have to accept that those who accuse the ABC of having a leftish bias have got a point”

“The whole point is Dick” explained Michelle “that anyone who accuses the ABC of bias is by definition too biased to judge. The fact is we are an organisation fairly balanced between the views of Tony Jones, Barry Cassidy and Philip Adams so when we exhibit a rightish balance it can be quite difficult to distinguish it from the views of the Greens”

“So given your commitment to maintain fair and balanced coverage at the ABC” enquired Dick “why don’t you employrightish political commentators like Andrew Bolt?”

“He’s far too biased” explained Michelle

“But you employ Yassin Abdel-Magied” pointed out Dick “who made those singularly inappropriate remarks about Anzac Day”

“The point is however” asserted Michelle “that those were her own views and not those of the ABC”

“But if you don’t approve of her views” persisted Dick “why don’t you boot her out in the same way as Sky booted Mark Latham?”

“Our multicultural policy” explained Michelle “precludes us from taking the same action on her as Sky took on Mark”

“Why don’t you introduce fairness and balance on Q&A” asked Dick “by having as many rightists on the panel as leftists?”

“Because it wouldn’t comprise all shades of leftish views” claimed Michelle “if some fair and balanced leftists on the panel were replaced by rightists”

“Aren’t you concerned” enquired Dick “that you’re not fulfilling your charter to provide Australians with fair and balanced news coverage and commentary?”

“Not at all” responded Michelle “I can give you my absolute assurance that Tony Jones and all the rest of our current affairs team are the most scrupulously fair and balanced leftist commentators on television”

“There must be a danger” cautioned Dick “that if you carry on like this the government will make further cuts to your budget”

“Not at all” responded Michelle emphatically “we’ve only got to get through another year or so before the next federal election and I’m certain that given their endorsement of our coverage as being absolutely fair and balanced the Labor Party will get elected and with the support of the Greens the money will start flowing in again”

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About this Series
Dick’s outstanding career in political journalism owes much to recent advances in psychiatric treatment. In his role as a leading Canberra correspondent Dick enjoys an especially close rapport with all the leading politicians and the loony left because he’s met them all at the treatment centre.

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