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The Pudding Club Pontifications

Quidless in Corfu

Quidless in Corfu

Friday 20 February, 2015
In a particularly compelling debate club members opt not to support the Alex Tsipras appeal to fund yet another Greek tragedy.
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The Pudding Club section Friday Mash.com

Lord Noes, General Alarm and Sir Rah Sera lunched at the Club this week on Tournedos Rossini enriched by a wonderfully orgiastic Gevrey-Chambertin.

‘I say’ said Sir Rah ‘what do you make of the absolutely extraordinary demands of the new Greek prime minister?’

‘The man’s a complete charlatan’ replied His Lordship ‘who should be thrown into a debtor’s prison. Greece is becoming a sewerage system for the entire EU economy and this Tsipras guy won’t rest until the entire amount is flushed away to become effluent on the Aegean’

‘I know what I would do’ said the General ‘send in a UN economy-keeping force of accountants and auditors. The only other alternative is to re-instate the Colonels. Ever since they got the arse and the Greeks have been allowed to vote again the joint has been to hell in an Hellenic hand-basket’

‘What I find wholly disturbing’ said Sir Rah ‘is that this Tsipras cove wants the EU to regard all the money they’ve invested in saving the Greeks from penury as gambling losses. Based on that philosophy any member of the EU can piddle away as much cash as it likes and the rest of us are duty bound to save it from the privations of Oxfam and the Salvation Army’

‘I couldn’t agree more’ said His Lordship ‘if I’d been David I’d have told Tsipras to stop spending like a sheikh at Harrods and start shopping at Aldi’

‘If the EU doesn’t ease the burden of debt repayments’ said Sir Rah ‘there’s a very good chance of a Grexit’

‘Good riddance’ said the General ‘I suggest we send Nigel over to give them a bit of encouragement’

‘I see they’re trying to get eleven billion euros off Angela’ said Sir Rah ‘to pay for the damage caused by Germany during World War II’

‘Fat chance’ said His Lordship ‘if Angela paid us enough to cover all the damage we suffered Germany would be in a worse economic state than Greece’

‘I once went to an orgy in Athens’ said the General ‘and it lasted for a week’

‘That’s nothing’ said His Lordship ‘the orgy of spending there has been going on for years and still doesn’t seem to have reached a climax’

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About this Series
Located on the fashionable side of Pall Mall the Club is famous for counting some of the UK’s greatest political intellects among its members. Lord Noes, General Alarm and Sir Rah Sera convene there regularly to create the brilliant insights which David relies on so much to keep the ship of state on course.

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