Offering a uniquely Australian perspective on the US Presidential election

A Hole Comments

Some prime ministers are born great others achieve greatness and others get the gig in Australia

Some prime ministers are born great others achieve greatness and others get the gig in Australia

Friday 3 July, 2015
A Hole, Australia’s most anal social commentator, canvasses the question of where the next great prime minister of Australia will come from now that the Coalition and Labor seem to have given up on the challenge.
The story starts here...

A Hole Comments on FridayMash

The downward trend in prime ministerial standards is extremely worrying especially since the Killing Season failed to have any remedial effect.

Hawke, Keating and Howard provided a reasonable run but the Rudd, Gillard, Rudd, Abbott and possibly Shorten sequence indicates that the prime ministers Australians deserve have arguably become football managers or TV talk-show hosts instead.

We simply can’t afford to go on like this because it could lead to people even as dodgy as Clive getting the gig, the prime ministerial Killing Season could become an annual event and Eddie Obeid and Joe Tripodi could be called back into service as prime ministerial powerbrokers.

It is most unlikely that the next great prime minister will emerge from the union movement. In addition to the normal handicaps associated with this talent source it is likely that all putative union contenders will be spending an inordinate amount of time in coming years appearing at Royal Commissions.

There is undoubtedly a remarkable level of leadership talent among sporting coaches but this has been prejudiced as a potential source of great PMs by the experience of Tony running the country like a feral rugby coach.

Once marriage equality is established the gay community will inevitably start campaigning for prime ministerial equality comprising a gay First Bloke or First Sheila. At least this would guarantee a politically correct prime ministership.

Perhaps we should consider Gina Rinehart for the job providing she undertakes not to undermine everything while it’s just possible Tim Flannery could be the

climate change that puts an end to the drought of great prime ministers. It hardly seems possible George Pell could be the one not to lead us into temptation, Rupert Murdoch could certainly manage the 24-hour news cycle but James Packer would be a huge gamble.

Science is on the cusp of producing designer babies so perhaps the promise of a designer great prime minister can’t be far away.

Now that an Australian has been appointed coach of the England cricket team it is only logical that Australia should start looking abroad for its next great prime minister. Experienced performers like Tony Blair and Bill Clinton would become logical contenders to bring greatness back to the Lodge.

Given that space travel will shortly become a normal part of life perhaps that could result in the next great prime minister coming from another planet, although come to think of it perhaps we’ve tried that already.


About this Series
As one of Australia’s leading social commentators A Hole is always conscious of the need to avoid making an arse of himself. His commentaries are frequently compared to the material on the walls of public toilets although they don’t remain in the public consciousness anything like as long.

View all articles in the A Hole Comments Series
Share with
Sign up for Mailing List

powered by MailChimp!


You may also like...

Ins and Outs of Brexit
Pudding Club members discuss how far the UK should go in Brexiting...
Loss Leader Strategy
Lucy reports on the post Bennelong by-election session she had with...
Guy the Friday Mash Superfly was on a wall in the career advisor’s...
Don’t Kill Bill
Ged and Sally call in Bill to discuss why his career at the AWU is...
Nicking Off
Guy the Friday Mash Superfly was on a wall at a meeting of the SA...
In His Bad Books
Celebrated Canberra correspondent Dick Head interviews Kevin Rudd on...