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The Pudding Club Pontifications

Turning Hard Left

Turning Hard Left

Friday 21 August, 2015
Pudding Club members discuss the likely rise of Jeremy Corbyn as Labour leader and whether this would cause anyone in the Party to raise a red flag.
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The Pudding Club section Friday Mash.com

Lord Noes, General Alarm and Sir Rah Sera were unable to resist the Chef recommended lobster mornay for lunch last week and his exquisite choice of Pouilly-Fuissé to accompany it.

“The Labour Party has finally lost its marbles” said His Lordship “having been brought to brink of the fiscal cliff by Miliband it looks like they’re determined to go over it with Corbyn”

“I can understand it’s inevitable that every now and again the Labour Party is going to throw up a loony lemming like Corbyn who is driven to jump off a cliff but I’m damned if I can understand how he can persuade so many in the Party to follow him”

“I can only conclude ‘said His Lordship “that people are fed up with the race to the top because they never seem to win so they’re ready to try their luck in the race to the bottom”

“The truth is” said Sir Rah “people are so brassed off with politicians that if alternatives like Tsipras, Trump or Corbyn come along they’re ready to believe anything”

“Surely people can’t be so dick-headed as to believe these dipsticks can run a government” said the General

“Probably not” said Sir Rah “they just feel so vindicated that after years of conviction that politicians are a pack of shifty charlatans someone comes along and confirms they’ve been right all along”

“So what you are saying” said His Lordship ‘ís that this Corbyn cove isn’t getting all this support to lead the Labour Party because he’s a Labour politician”

“Good heavens no” said Sir Rah “in fact the Labour Party establishment think he’s a bigger menace than Boris Johnson. The loony Labour Party faction are voting for him because he claims both the Labour and Conservative Parties have had a more detrimental impact on their lives than either Jimmy Savile or the BBC and he will lead them out of austerity into penury at the very least”

“David must be laughing” said His Lordship

Of course” said Sir Rah “Corbyn is the best thing to happen to him since Gordon Brown’s economic policies”

“What sort of a guy is Corbyn?” asked the General

“A typical Islington Trotskyite” replied Sir Rah “He’s been in parliament for thirty-two years but he’s never seen the light of day because he’s spent so much time in underground movements”

“Could he survive as Labour leader?” asked His Lordship

“The question is rather would the Labour Party survive his leadership”

responded Sir Rah “My guess is that it would probably end up as the Southern branch of the SNP and Corbyn and Sturgeon would crap on about creating a socialist utopia where there is austerity for all to share”

“So what you’re saying is that Corbyn won’t become a major national nuisance” said His Lordship

“That’s right” said Sir Rah “apart from the threat of boring everybody shitless through being constantly interviewed on the BBC”

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About this Series
Located on the fashionable side of Pall Mall the Club is famous for counting some of the UK’s greatest political intellects among its members. Lord Noes, General Alarm and Sir Rah Sera convene there regularly to create the brilliant insights which David relies on so much to keep the ship of state on course.

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