Offering a uniquely Australian perspective on the US Presidential election

Clinic for the Electorally Brain Damaged

US Election Brain Damage Report

US Election Brain Damage Report

Friday 14 November, 2014
The Friday Mash Clinic for the Electorally Brain Damaged saved thousands from complete mental breakdown through their great work during the US Congressional Elections. Here is the Clinic’s official election report.
The story starts here...


The American electorate who have become extremely pissed off with Obama for not doing much have voted to give Republicans control of both the House of Reps and the Senate to ensure there’s no chance of him extending Obamacare to tackle climate change.

However all is not lost for the Democrats. Obama can still veto anything proposed by the Republican Congress like transforming Obamacare into a weight loss programme.

Another Democratic plus is that the President won’t look indecisive anymore because he won’t have to make any decisions apart from saying ‘no’ to everything proposed by the Republicans.

The situation is also seen as a major plus for Hillary’s presidential prospects. She can look incredibly decisive by criticising both the President and the Congress for not doing anything.

There are disagreements amongst distinguished international commentators about whether the US’s inability to do anything internationally will be a problem or a benefit.

On the one hand there will be less uncertainty for people crossing red lines established by Obama but on the other they had nothing to worry about anyway.

It will clearly reduce the impact of Wikileaks and Edward Snowden because there will be nothing worth leaking.

If the impasse between the President and Congress results in the US becoming totally inactive in the Middle East there is the risk of dangerous global warming developments when the Arab Spring turns into Summer.

Democrats are also very confident that if Obama becomes a lame duck or stuffed turkey president it will substantially reduce the rate of human scandals racked up by his administration.

There is of course the question of what government inaction could do for the economy. Economists believe it would be the best possible thing that could happen to it because it could open up the way for a new era of prosperity led by the inheritors of the Lehmann Bros and Bernie Madoff operational models.

Democratic Party leaders remain confident however that there’s no chance of Obama becoming a lame duck president for the next two years because they have placed the country’s leading vets on standby.

Absolute confirmation that the country has lapsed into total stagnation could come in two years’ time in the form of a presidential race between a Bush and a Clinton.


About this Series
The Friday Mash Clinic for the Electorally Brain-Damaged is the only medical facility in the country specialising in the treatment of brain malfunction caused by over exposure to election campaigns. The Clinic has achieved notable success in restoring normal brain activity even in patients who suffered acute anxiety waiting for Wayne to deliver a surplus.

View all articles in the Election Sanity Series
Share with
Sign up for Mailing List

powered by MailChimp!


You may also like...

Ins and Outs of Brexit
Pudding Club members discuss how far the UK should go in Brexiting...
Loss Leader Strategy
Lucy reports on the post Bennelong by-election session she had with...
Guy the Friday Mash Superfly was on a wall in the career advisor’s...
Don’t Kill Bill
Ged and Sally call in Bill to discuss why his career at the AWU is...
Nicking Off
Guy the Friday Mash Superfly was on a wall at a meeting of the SA...
In His Bad Books
Celebrated Canberra correspondent Dick Head interviews Kevin Rudd on...