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The Weak in Politics

Weak in Politics on 17th October 2014

Weak in Politics on 17th October 2014

Friday 17 October, 2014
It’s difficult to understand why the Greens are experiencing problems explaining why the world hasn’t got any hotter for the past seventeen years when it’s obviously been due to Julia’s carbon tax.
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Weak in Politics section from FridayMash

You decide on the great issues facing the nation

If you could choose one politician to spend a year with you on a desert island who would it be?
– Sarah Hanson Young as an act of kindness to the rest of Australia
– Kevin because he might be ok as the prime minister of a place as small as that
– Clive because if the island is swamped by rising sea levels you could live on him instead
– Scott Morrison to prevent the place being overrun by asylum seekers
– Jacqui Lambie because her experience of living in Tasmania would be a great help

I want to be absolutely clear about this

Bill Shorten is a supporter of Australia partaking in the War on Terror provided we don’t have to pay for it.

What he should immediately come clean about however is whether he believes it should be funded by savings from aborting the Royal Commission into the Unions or collecting co-payments from Syria and Iraq for visits by the RAAF.

Green & Bear It

It’s difficult to understand why the Greens are experiencing problems explaining why the world hasn’t got any hotter for the past seventeen years when it’s obviously been due to Julia’s carbon tax.

Emissions from the Royal Commissions

Tony is hoping that Australia’s involvement in the war on ISIL will only last a year because at the end of 2015 the Royal Commission into the Unions will deliver its report and he’ll have to turn his attention to all the terrorist activities that it will inevitably reveal.

Julia Gillard Thought Bubble

‘When they make a film of my book obviously Meryl Streep will play me but I can’t make up my mind between Hugh Jackman, Ryan Gosling and Daniel Craig for the role of First Bloke.

Heard down the corridors of power

‘There’s a possibility that PUP could form the next state government in Queensland’’
‘Queensland, Newman benighted one day, Palmer disunited the next’

Tony Abbott Thought Bubble

‘If cutting their budget doesn’t cause the ABC to take Lateline off the air I wonder if they’d be prepared to accept a bribe’

Conniving with Clive

Clive will not be modelling his latest swimwear designs at summer fashion shows this year. This is thought to be because he’s donating all his togs to a humanitarian group who are providing accommodation for Middle East refugees.

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About this Series
This is the column with insights that all the other publications seem unable to cope with. That’s arguably because they take politics far too seriously.

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