Offering a uniquely Australian perspective on the US Presidential election

Words Speak Louder Than Actions

Words Speak Louder Than Actions

Friday 10 March, 2017
In the wake of his unexpectedly Presidential address to Congress Trump discusses with his team the new challenges he could face from becoming too popular.
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In the wake of his unexpectedly Presidential address to Congress Trump discusses with his team the new challenges he could face from becoming too popular.

 “Great speech to Congress Don” commented Reince enthusiastically “you really surprised everybody by actually sounding like a President”

“You don’t think people will start confusing me with Obama do you?” asked Trump

“Only when you get into one of your darker moods” replied Reince

“The fact is” explained Kellyanne “that up to this point people have regarded you as more of a temporary nuisance than a President and have been anticipating that at any time the FBI could save the country by whisking you off to some remote place and allowing someone more sensible like Mike Pence or Hillary to take over and restore a state of normality”

“It’s going to come as a gut-wrenching realisation to many” asserted Reince “that they’re now stuck with you as President for at least a few more months”

“I think it would be a kindness to many grieving souls” advised Kellyanne “if you didn’t do anything for a few days that would cause further trauma like deporting twelve million Hispanics”

“What about my plan” asked Trump “to send a SWAT team into Russia to snatch Edward Snowden?”

“Look Don” commented Reince “it’s a brilliant initiative which would bury once and for all the theory that you and Putin are best buddies but it would make Snowden look like a bigger folk hero than Chelsea Manning”

“What’s your opinion Mad Dog?” asked Trump

“Woof woof” replied Mad Dog decisively “woof woofwoof”

“I just feel I should exploit the favourable reaction to my speech” opined Trump “by following up with something absolutely outrageous like invoicing the President of Mexico for the wall”

“If I were you Don” advised Reince “I’d keep taking the chill pills for a few more days and get back on the jungle juice next week”

“Do you think it’s just possible” asked Trump “that people are still confused over whether I’m a great President or a rabble-rousing ratbag?”

“No way” replied Kellyanne “the majority have no doubt whatsoever that you’re a rabble-rousing ratbag but enough are convinced that’s what it takes to become a great President”

“Ok then” declared Trump “next week I’m going start banning Muslims immigrants, building the wall, nuking ISIS and doing deals with Putin”

“Wait a minute” warned Reince “you should keep in mind that the folks admire Presidents who act Presidential and say Presidential things but they get uneasy when a President actually starts spending money or upsetting people”




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