by Tori Banger

Driving Test
The question the Lib Dems have to answer is who is in the driving seat. There are indications it is still Nick Clegg although David Cameron seems to be acting as co-driver. The police thought it was Chris Huhne’s wife but she claims it is her husband despite the fact that he’s gone and joined another party.

Flour Power
As he made an election campaign speech last week someone showered Francois Hollande with flour. Commentators observed that appropriately enough it was plain rather than self-raising.

A Gold Meddle
The ordinate cost and scarcity of Olympic tickets in the UK is a source of much angst. Insiders suspect a deal with the TV networks to maximise local ratings.

Argy Bargy
The Argentinian authorities are not at all impressed with the arrival of Prince William in the Falkland Islands on active duty. As a gesture of goodwill a UK spokesman reportedly suggested that he should attend the premiere of the Iron Lady in Buenos Aires.

A Big Smack
Guardians of the EU purse-strings are concerned that Greece is not implementing the agreed austerity measures satisfactorily. This is hardly surprising. It takes time to adjust to the fact that McDonalds is a luxury.