Posts Tagged ‘Bill Clinton’
Newsletter from Australia
White House,
Washington DC.,
22nd January 2010
Dear Mr President,
We’re all so disappointed. Hillary canceled her visit to Australia. It’s such a shame. We even had the local mayor lined up for an official welcome.
We’re not sure whether she had to go and sort out another disaster in world affairs or in Bill’s affairs.
It was too late to invite Prince William to take her place. Lovely young fellow he is. I’d marry him myself if it wasn’t for Neville and the fact that I’m already Queen of the Beauthaven Beer Festival.
What on earth’s going on in your country? Fancy calling poor old Harry Reid a racist. He isn’t even in the Republican Party.
Even I was accused of racism last week. I refused to let this friend of Gladys’ join the club. Its true he’s a Sri Lankan but he’s also an absolute arsehole.
You’re not going to believe this but Penny Wong’s already rabbiting on about a third go at passing the ETS legislation. Its like having to sit through one of Fidel Castro’s speeches for a third time. Can’t you find her a position measuring climate change in Northern Alaska?
I know you’ll be thrilled to hear that this week our World Affairs Think Tank tackled one of the most momentous questions facing Australia, ‘Should we become a republic’. It would have been lovely to have Prince William there to speak on behalf of his mother.
Marge reckoned it all depends on what sort of republic. We don’t want to become a banana republic or a republic like Germany and Russia which don’t seem to have any fun and start all the wars. She recognised that the US was also a republic which started wars but at least you seem to have a bit of fun.
Gladys thought it was a shame that the US was no longer a monarchy because we could have played you at cricket and you wouldn’t be wasting so much time in the shower.
Cyril said it would be great if Australia became a republic because Malcolm Turnbull could become President and it would stop him making a nuisance of himself.
Mildred believed that Australia should stay a monarchy with an Aussie royal family. All our royal talent like Princess Mary are having to go abroad because of a lack of opportunities back home.
Our Mavis’ Bert agreed with Mildred and said that even the Welsh Rugby team had its own Queen.
Mavis thought that Malcolm Fraser is qualified to become King of Australia because he’s such a right royal pain in the ass.
Arthur thought we should become a republic to avoid getting a Queen whose only qualification for the job was a propensity for sending Charles potty with passion.
I summed it all up brilliantly by pointing out that as the Obama Fan Club was dedicated to a Democrat there’s no way we can support Australia becoming Republican.
I’m so excited that we’re producing such good stuff for you.
Till next week.
Gaelene Woo
President
Tags: Barack Obama, Bill Clinton, ETS, Fidel Castro, Harry Reid, Hillary Clinton, Malcolm Fraser, Malcolm Turnbull, Obama Fan Club, Penny Wong, President, President of USA, Prince Charles, Prince William, Princess Mary, Republican Party, The Queen
Posted in Obama Fan Club | No Comments »
Newsletter from Australia
White House,
Washington DC.,
15th January 2010
Dear Mr President,
I can’t tell you how excited we all are. We’ve just heard that Hillary is coming to Australia next week and would you believe Prince William is coming at the same time. It’s a good job she’s not a republican.
We obviously couldn’t invite both of them to address the Obama Fan Club during the same week, so we held an emergency meeting of the management committee and chose Hillary because she’s such a wonderful woman and so close to you.
I hope you don’t mind but we’ve sent her a direct message inviting her to our meeting on the nineteenth. She gets booked up so early and I dare say your ambassador Jeff Bleach has already booked her in for a nosh or two with Kevin.
We also told her to bring Bill along too if he’s coming with her. You may recall I told you that Mildred met Bill when she was a pole dancer in Vegas. If we can find a pole I’m sure he’d recognise her.
The Japanese are furious with Julia over whales. She’s doing the PM’s job while Kevin is away writing children’s books.
When it comes to whales there’s a huge cultural difference between the Aussies and the Japs. They believe they should be harpooned and eaten while we see them as cuddly creatures who deserve a better fate than being served as sashimi.
Julia’s thrown one of her headmistress wobblers telling the Japs to stop sinking the protesters’ boats which are trying to sink their whaling ships and suggesting more controversial places to stick their harpoons.
Meanwhile the Japs have told her in no uncertain terms to keep her nose out of it and you can understand why. It’s very large and pointed and would be a very effective substitute for a harpoon.
This week the Club’s World Affairs Think-tank debated whether the Copenhagen Conference had been any use at all.
Hilda said it was inspiring that delegates could still get their knickers in a knot about global warming when they were suffering from frostbite.
Gladys who’s never said anything before made a very critical contribution. She reckoned the Conference would have been a huge success if the other forty thousand delegates had just turned up for the last day like you. It was the previous ten days that caused all the problems.
Neville thought the conference in Mexico might go better because the climate will allow the delegates to demonstrate solar power and not just their wind power.
Mildred made a very astute observation. She reckoned there were too many people there. China and the US got distracted. All you need is a conference where those two agree to a reasonable reduction in emissions and the rest of us can carry on as usual.
I summed up the meeting by blaming Tony Abbott for the mess in Copenhagen. It was his fault the rest of the world didn’t get the chance to adopt Kevin and Penny’s ETS. Though perhaps they were not so inclined to be Penny foolish as pound wise.
Till next week,
Gaelene Woo
President
Tags: Barack Obama, Bill Clinton, China, Climate Change, Copenhagen Conference, ETS, global warming, Hillary Clinton, Japanese whaling, Jeff Bleach, Julia Gillard, Kevin Rudd, Obama, Obama Fan Club, Penny Wong, Prince William, Solar Power, Tony Abbott, Wind power
Posted in Obama Fan Club | 1 Comment »
It’s such a busy time of year and not surprising that so many forget about New Year’s Resolutions. Here’s a few gentle reminders to those sorely in need.
Hostesses and
cocktail waitresses - ban dates with Tiger
Obama - change into something we can really believe in
President Hu - develop an image as Old King Coal
Tony Abbott - take the painful step up to ferret smugglers
Malcolm Turnbull - reduce greenhouse gas emissions by becoming less of an old fart
Gordon Brown - take constipation tablets regularly
Berlusconi - stay out of crowds unless they’re young girls
Penny Wong - tattoo ‘ETS’ on her backside so she can sit on it for a while
Father Christmas - abandon plans to extend his franchise into Afghanistan
Julie Bishop - pick up a few tips from Deputy Dawg
Bill Clinton - don’t become jealous of Tiger
Robert Mugabe - spend Zimbabwe’s climate change grant from the UN on a luxury ski lodge in St Moritz
Julia Gillard - stop talking like an education revolution headmistress
Joe Tripodi – reduce carbon emissions by becoming a solar power broker
Al Gore - stop emiting anything. We’ve got the message
The Mayor of Copenhagen - clean up after the cyclones, earthquakes and bushfires caused by the Climate Change Conference
Sarah Palin - make an unpresidented impact
Joe Hockey - reduce waist in the Liberal Party
Kevin - achieve a further reduction in greenhouse emissions by extending the ETS to cover baked beans and artichokes
Tiger - become President of US Adulterers Anonymous and recruit Bill Clinton, Eliot Spitzer and Mark Sanford as foundation members
Wayne Swan - needs to take at least a couple of stimulus packages a day
Tags: Afghanistan, Al Gore, Barack Obama, Bill Clinton, Climate Change, ETS, Gordon Brown, Joe Hockey, Joe Tripodi, Julia Gillard, Julie Bishop, Kevin Rudd, Liberal Party, Malcolm Turnbull, President Hu, Robert Mugabe, Santa, Sarah Palin, Silvio Berlusconi, Tiger Woods, Tony Abbott, Wayne Swan
Posted in Business, International Affairs, Politics, Weekly Mash | No Comments »
In retrospect the Copenhagen Conference seems like Woodstock without the music.
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It seems unfair that despite the compelling claims of her predecessors the special qualifications of Kristina Keneally will result in her becoming the first NSW Premier to be acclaimed the mother of all disasters.
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Prince Charles warned at Copenhagen that Australia could be facing a major calamity. Hopefully the Queen will live for many more years.
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In the past rugby league players who got hammered and assaulted women were simply regarded as hooligans. Management consultants however now believe it is a vital part of the experience needed for them to become NSW Government Ministers.
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It is interesting to speculate how many delegates at the Climate Change Conference availed themselves of the free services offered by Copenhagen hookers and how many took action to reduce the effects of extra-marital climate changes.
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Did anyone seriously believe that delegates from one hundred and ninety nations including Robert Mugabe, Hugo Chavez, Al Gore, Prince Charles and Kevin and thousands of left-wing loony rioters were going to agree on anything? If only Barnaby Joyce had been there things could have been a whole lot different.
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Inside US sources confirm that Bill Clinton is still claiming he was unjustly impeached. He’s apparently adamant that when he said ‘ I did not have sex with that woman’ he was talking about Hillary not Monica.
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All the signs are that neither Kevin nor Obama saved the world in Copenhagen. Perhaps someone better qualified will turn up on Christmas Day.
Tags: Al Gore, Bill Clinton, Christmas, Climate Change, Copenhagen, Hillary Clinton, Hugo Chavez, Kevin Rudd, NSW Government, NSW Premier, Obama, President, President of USA, Prince Charles, Robert Mugabe, rugbly league, The Queen
Posted in Carbon Emissions | 7 Comments »
Letter to Father Christmas
Dear Santa,
‘Tis the season when people of goodwill at Friday Mash think not of themselves but only of others.
We would really appreciate the delivery of our Christmas gift list set out below in your usual timely festive fashion.
Kevin Rudd - a pair of budgie smugglers to prove he’s got nothing to hide.
Malcolm Turnbull - a CD of Kevin singing ‘Wonderful, wonderful Copenhagen’
Tony Abbott - a DNA test to prove he’s not the lovechild of John Howard and Bronwyn Bishop
Barack Obama - the Nobel Olympic Prize for failing to bring the Games to Chicago
Penny Wong - a climate change; a long stay in Siberia perhaps
Sarah Palin - melting moments at the North Pole with Al Gore
Hillary Clinton - an ‘I should have been President’ bumper sticker
Kristina Keneally - the magic formula which turned Pinocchio from a puppet into a person
Peter Garrett - a part in Coneheads II
Bill Clinton - Tiger’s mobile with all the phone numbers
General McChrystal - a McBall so he can forsee what’s about to happen in Afghanistan
Joe Hockey - a Father Christmas outfit because he’s your natural successor
Julia Gillard - a life size Tony Abbott doll so she no longer has to flirt with him in person
Wayne Swan - a Navman so he can find his way out of the woods
George W Bush - WMDs found in Iraq
Gordon Brown - something to wear under his kilt because he’s been left dangling recently
Berlusconi - bandaids
John Howard - a dancing frog wearing a Bob Hawke face mask. On second thoughts the mask wont be necessary
Barry O’Farrell - a gift similar to that bestowed on so many hostesses and cocktail waitresses; a bit of Tiger in him
The People of NSW - an early election
The delivery of these gifts will make many people very happy. Making people happy is one of your gifts which politicians seem incapable of accepting.
Merry Christmas
From Friday Mash
Tags: Afghanistan, Al Gore, Barack Obama, Barry O’Farrell, Bill Clinton, Bronwyn Bishop, budgie smugglers, Christmas, Copenhagen, early election, Father Christmas, General McChrystal, George W Bush, Gordon Brown, Hillary Clinton, Joe Hockey, John Howard, Julia Gillard, Kevin Rudd, Kristina Keneally, Malcolm Turnbull, Penny Wong, Peter Garrett, Sarah Palin, Silvio Berlusconi, Tiger Woods, Tony Abbott, Wayne Swan, WMD
Posted in Weekly Mash | No Comments »
Story No. 9
‘I was lying in bed the other morning’ said George ‘and I came up with a brilliant idea for solving the Israeli-Palestinian problem’
‘Oh that’s great George’ I said with as much enthusiasm as I could muster given there was as much chance of George solving the Israeli-Palestinian problem as Hillary Clinton phoning to offer me a date with her glamorous bitch.
‘I’ll invite Arafat and Sharon to come to the White House for as long as it takes to get things sorted. What do you think?’
‘Sorry George’ I said ‘but Bill Clinton’s already tried that. They all shook hands on a deal then Arafat and Rabin went home and carried on as usual’
‘How about if I rendition them instead?’ mused George
‘George’ I said ‘Listen to me. The whole Israeli-Palestinian thing is a massive dog’s breakfast. My advice is leave it alone. You’ve already got a huge mess in Afghanistan and Iraq and you don’t want to score a Middle East trifecta’
‘Barney’ said George ‘solving the Israeli-Palestinian thing is my destiny. The crowning achievement of my presidency. I need your help to do great things’
‘Even with my help’ I said ‘you’d still have a better chance of being appointed chief rocket scientist at NASA’
‘All I’ve got to do’ said George ‘is persuade the Palestinians that becoming good neighbours with the Israelis is a better policy than annihilating them’
‘George’ I said ‘it’s the same as you living next door to Osama bin Laden. In those circumstances being good neighbours is not firing rockets at each other for an hour or two’
‘Alright then’ said George ‘I’ll persuade the Israelis to accept the state of Palestine’
‘Then the question you have to consider’ I said ‘is whether Jerusalem becomes part of Palestine or whether Israel keeps it’
‘Tell you what’ said George ‘I’ll persuade them to toss for it; heads Israel keeps Jerusalem, tails it becomes the capital of Palestine’
‘I’ve got a better idea’ I said ‘we could sit you on a horse, create the legend of George of Arabia and then you could lead the Palestinians across the desert to their promised land. I’d make a fortune out of Hollywood for the film rights’
‘Great thinking Barney’ said George ‘I could cut off all US financial support for Israel until they agree to everything’
‘No chance’ I said ‘if you did that you would never be invited to another bar mitzvah, lose a squillion in campaign funding and you’d be kicked out at the next election’
‘Do you really thing so?’ asked George ‘Perhaps you’re right Barney about leaving the Israeli-Palestinian thing alone. There’s plenty of other areas where I can do great things’
‘Right on George’ I said ‘for example you could create the Dogs Hall of Fame. Lassie and I would be shoe-ins’
‘Great idea’ said George ‘that would certainly guarantee me the dogsbody vote’
Tags: Afghanistan, Arafat, Bill Clinton, Bush & Barney, Bush and Barney, George Bush, George of Arabia, George W Bush, Hillary Clinton, Iraq, Israeli, Jerusalem, Middle East trifecta, NASA, Osama Bin Laden, Palestinian, Rabin, Sharon, White House
Posted in Bush and Barney | No Comments »
Story No: 7
‘Now George’ I said ‘I hope you don’t mind if I ask you a personal question but have you had sex recently?’
George looked stunned. Although to be fair this was probably the first time he had been questioned by a dog about his sex life.
‘Good heavens Barney’ said George ‘That’s a very personal question. Why do you ask?’
‘Well’ I said ‘the sex life of US Presidents is a fascinating study. On the one hand you would think that to a man they would represent a morality and steely resolve which is impervious to carnal desires while on the other there’s Kennedy and Clinton’
‘But they were both democrats’ said George ‘Republicans are not susceptible to temptation’
‘Well I’m a republican’ I said ‘and I’m tempted. But doesn’t it surprise you that your predecessors had a bit on the side with Marilyn Monroe and Monica Lewinsky and most other pieces of skirt that came along?’
‘Not really’ said George ‘although I’d be astounded to hear that about Nixon, Reagan and my father’
‘So would your mother’ I said ‘but Nixon didn’t mind a bit of burglary now and then’
‘Oh I think Watergate was very overblown’ said George ‘after all it was only a political burglary’
‘Now come on George’ I said ‘you’re the most powerful man in the world and there must be women throwing themselves at you’
‘It’s true’ said George ‘that women find me highly attractive. But I close my eyes and think of Bill Clinton saying ‘I did not have sex with that woman’ and I find that’s enough excitement for one day’
‘My great ambition’ I said ‘is to join the mile high club on Air Force One’
‘Then there are two things you should keep in mind’ said George ‘every inch of the plane is under video surveillance apart from my bedroom and toilet and the crew has strict instructions never to become involved in a dogflight’
‘Oh then’ I said ‘I’ll switch my ambition to becoming a member of the oval office club’
‘Barney’ said George ‘I would never allow a republican like you to become a member of any club which counts Bill Clinton and Monica Lewinsky amongst its members’
‘Look George’ I said ‘you may choose to be reticent about your sex life but I’m at the end of my leash. I haven’t got one. You’ve never fixed me up with that bitch at the Clinton’s. Don’t tell me the only sexual fulfilment I’m likely to get comes from rubbing myself against Dick Cheney’s leg’
‘Well Barney’ said George ‘if it’s that big a problem I could arrange for you to get the unkindest cut of all’
‘No George I’ll manage’ I said hastily ‘but I’ve got an idea. With my impeccable pedigree you could make quite a few bucks sending me to stud for a week or two’
‘So you screw yourself silly and I get paid for it’ said George ‘that hardly befits a president’
‘Why not?’ I said ‘you’re screwing Iraq and we’re all paying for it’
Tags: Air Force One, Bill Clinton, Democrats, Dick Cheney, George Bush, George W Bush, Iraq, John F Kennedy, Marilyn Monroe, Monica Lewinsky, Nixon, President, President of USA, Regan, Republicans
Posted in Bush and Barney | 1 Comment »
Story No: 4
‘It will be all over in a month’ said George
I groaned inwardly. He’d obviously been talking to Dick Cheney and Don Rumsfeld again. When it came to invading Iraq they were like rottweilers with two sets of teeth.
I like George. He’s a model dog-owner, always looked after his buddies in Wall St and the oil business and never got too big for his kennel.
But when it came to the presidential stuff he was a bit light on. The problem was that his world ended just west of LA and east of Washington. He’d heard of London and Paris but only in Rocky movies. His qualifications for running a war overseas were about on a par with Paris Hilton’s.
‘George’ I said ‘you might capture Baghdad inside a month but it will take years to de-terrorise Iraq. Instead of invading the place I’d send Dick and Don there on suicide bombing missions.”
‘That’s’ a load of dogwash’ said George
I sighed and resigned myself to having another deep and meaningful with him.
‘I’ve got this pal who’s an Afghan hound’ I said ‘Based on his local knowledge he reckons our troops will be stuck in Afghanistan for years and Iraq would be the same’.
‘Good heavens’ said George ‘whatever should I do?’
‘The time has come George’ I said gravely ‘for you to prove yourself a truly great statesman, to assert that the US will remain the undisputed world superpower ready to stand against threats to our freedom and integrity even by making pre-emptive strikes’.
‘Bravo Barney’ said George, who was visibly moved by my eloquence.
‘And’ I said triumphantly ‘we’ll call that the Bush Dogtrine’.
‘The Bush Dogtrine’ said George ‘What an impressive label for my legacy to America and the world. Does this mean you agree it’s time to clobber Saddam and finish what dad started?’
‘Absolutely not’ I said ‘The Bush Dogtrine is designed to scare the shit out of Saddam not shoot it out of him. If you invade Iraq there will be a backlash against the GOP and Hillary or Barack Obama will be elected president in 2008’
‘What a horrible thought’ said George ‘but the country will never get suckered in by the Clintons a second time and they’ll never believe in a change like Obama. Look Barney I know Colin Powell tends to agree with you but Dick and Don are dead against you’
Well that was reassuring. The idea of being in agreement with Dick and Don was about as attractive as catfood.
‘George’ I said ‘it sorrows me to see you lined up with the coalition of the willing’
‘Coalition of the willing’ said George ‘That’s brilliant Barney. That’s the name I’ll bestow on the multinational force bringing democracy to Iraq’
‘And what are you going to say to the forty-five million people who inhabit that great country?’ I asked
‘You mean Iraq is a country’ gasped George ‘I thought it was an oil company’
Tags: Afghanistan, Barack Obama, Bill Clinton, Bush & Barney, catfood, Coalition of the willing, Colin Powell, democracy in Iraq, Dick Cheney, Don Rumsfeld, George Bush, George W Bush, Hillary Clinton, oil company, Paris Hilton, President of USA, Rocky, Saddam Hussein, suicide bombing
Posted in Bush and Barney | No Comments »
Story No: 3
‘Barney I need to talk with you about Tony Blair’s visit’ said George, ‘It’s a very critical step in planning the Iraq thing and I would appreciate your advice on how we should approach him’
‘I could shit on his shoes’ I said
I just wasn’t a Tony Blair fan. For one thing he was trying to ban fox hunting in the UK and that would put all my foxhound buddies out of a job.
‘Look George’ I said ‘here’s my considered view. Tony Blair is a socialist and you just can’t trust them in a war. At some point the British unions will kick up a fuss and have him fired if he doesn’t pull out. Unions only like wars against bosses’
‘But Barney’ said George ‘I need the Brits in Iraq. That would encourage the other European nations to join in’
‘Forget it’ I said ‘ the French are too far up themselves and each other, the Germans are still suffering from Hitler hangover and the Italians wouldn’t fight even if Saddam kidnapped all their women and charged them for sex. You’re much better off with a man of steel like John Howard’
‘Man of steel’ said George ‘I like that Barney, you really come up with them. But Colin Powell has assured me that Saddam has WMDs’
‘Listen George’ I said ‘You’ve got less chance of finding WMDs in Iraq than winning the Nobel Peace Prize. As soon as you start rattling the first sabre Saddam will rush them over the border into Syria before you can say ‘Barney I’ve fixed a date for you with that bitch at the Clintons’’.
‘Ok Barney’ said George ‘how would you deal with Saddam?’
‘Simple’ I said ‘send him broke. I’ve got a buddy who’s a guard dog at the Stock Exchange and he’s given me some insider sniffing that Bernie Madoff’s going down in a year of two’
‘Not dear old Bernie’ said George ‘He’s one of my main campaign contributors’
‘Here’s what you do’ I said ‘Get some CIA spooks to pose as international financiers and convince Saddam to invest his shirt on Bernie’s WMDs. He’ll be so excited he won’t twig it stands for worst money disasters’
‘Barney’ said George ‘You’re not serious about Tony Blair are you?’
‘Sure I am’ I said ‘There’s one other thing you should know, he didn’t pass my sniff test. Last time he was here I gave him a really good sniffing and discovered he’s just a typical Brit who doesn’t change his underpants regularly’
‘One other thing’ said George ‘He might bring his deputy Gordon Brown’
Now that was better news. Gordon was more my sort of chap. He had a Scottish heritage just like me and agreed with my considered opinion that Tony Blair was a mongrel.
‘Come on Barney’ said George ‘What’s your strategy for finding out what’s really on Tony’s mind?’
‘It wont be easy’ I said ‘but if he changes his underpants and I don’t shit on his shoes there’s a good chance he will come clean’.
Tags: Bernie Madoff, Bill Clinton, British, Bush & Barney, fox hunting, French, George Bush, George W Bush, Germans, Gordon Brown, Hillary Clinton, Iraq, John Howard, Noble Peace Prize, Saddam Hussein, Tony Blair, UK, WMD
Posted in Bush and Barney | No Comments »
Newsletter from Australia
White House,
Washington DC.,
25th September 2009
Dear Mr President,
I’ve never been so stoked in my whole life. As a result of our Newsletter two weeks ago you appointed Jeff Bleach as US Ambassador over here and now dear old Kim has been appointed as our ambassador to your country.
The Obama Fan Club is so proud that our Newsletter was the catalyst for these high-level diplomatic appointments. We had no idea we would make such a huge impact on the Aussie-US relationship.
Kim is such a lovely man and I’m sure you’ll enjoy having him round to dinner. His nickname’s ‘Bomber’ by the way and I believe that’s because when any country came the raw prawn with Australia they’d soon back off when we threatened to drop Kim on them.
He has to watch his weight though. I’m afraid he’s going to scoff too many burgers and pizzas over there and end up in a Jenny Craig advertising campaign. When he comes to dinner I’d get Michelle to ring Jenny for a bit of low carb takeaway.
Of course the really interesting thing is that Kim would be our prime minister today if Kevin hadn’t done the dirty on him. Mind you it’s not in Kevin’s nature to do the dirty in a really nasty way and now he’s fixed Kim up with the top gig over there I think it’s all turned out for the best don’t you?
The other eighteen members of the G20 are so lucky to have you and Kevin around to keep them out of the doodoo. Most of them haven’t got a clue about climate change. They should live in Melbourne for a few weeks and then they’d know what it’s all about.
We’re so rapt that you and Kevin are leading us so bravely towards a carbon-free world. At our current rate of progress Australia could be the only country dragging the chain. It looks like Kevin’s finding it much easier to convince China and India than Barnaby Joyce and Wilson Tuckey.
You’re not going to believe this. The media here is full of stuff about Kevin using four letter expletives beginning with ‘f’. Then on top of that Bill Clinton called him Mr Rude. Just as I was beginning to come to terms with these shattering revelations up pops Julia of all people confessing that she does it too. ‘Well —- me’ I thought, but I didn’t say it of course.
Swearing is strictly forbidden at Obama Fan Club meetings and I’ve told Neville I’m not putting up with it even if the Eels don’t win the grand final.
Mildred reckons all politicians do it but I think she was talking about sex. If Kevin ever lets an ‘f’ word go in my presence he’ll find that I’m not called the Beauthaven Bombshell just for my looks.
By the way I almost forgot. When you see Kevin at the G20 please remind him to take his constipation tablets.
Till next week.
Gaelene Woo,
President
Tags: Barnaby Joyce, Bill Clinton, China, Chinese Government, G20, India, Jeff Bleach, Kevin Rudd, Kim Beazley, Wilson Tuckey
Posted in Obama Fan Club | No Comments »
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