In an inspiring vote of confidence in the Liberal Party as many as seventeen hopefuls fronted for pre-selection as their candidate for the federal seat of Bradfield.

Admittedly it is the safest Liberal seat in the country but its still truly remarkable that seventeen apparently sane and talented people were prepared to risk rushing lemming-like towards the big drop in Liberal polling.

They probably weren’t aware that Mark Latham had stuffed the parliamentary pension, Kevin had just scythed twenty-five percent off parliamentary expenses and as far as the ETS is concerned Malcolm is more in agreement with Kevin than the Coalition.

It’s possible they hadn’t realised their time in Canberra could be characterised as Alice in Ruddland. There they would encounter the Tin Man, successor to the Man of Steel but of a very different mettle. Also Wilson, the Wicked Witch of The West, who is trying to persuade Malcolm to take a long spell.

They were surely aware of the long tedious hours in prospect listening to Kevin’s answers during question time. This is like listening to constant repetitions of the ABC’s weather forecasts, although, to be fair, the forecasts are more relevant answers to Malcolm’s questions.

It is unlikely they would know about secret assignments they may have to undertake to further the party’s interests. They could be asked to emulate the extraordinary pioneering work by Gareth Evans when he seduced a major political figure into defecting to the Labour Party.

Their assignment could even be someone like Julia. She doesn’t normally kiss Liberals but it is rumoured that she kissed Mark Latham so anything is possible. It would help if they were built like a school hall because that would certainly attract some stimulus.

They were all surely inspired by the political career of John Howard who will long be remembered by George W Bush, Peter Costello and the captain of the Tampa. He saved a grateful nation from Mark Latham and converted the country into an asylum which people all over the world are still seeking.

The previous Liberal candidate selected by Bradfield ended up being appointed by a Labor prime minister to a prime diplomatic post in Brussels. Given the current state of the Liberal Party the best hope for the new candidate is that Kevin will send him to Brussels before he has to declare whether he supports the ETS or not.

There is a fair chance that Paul Fletcher, the anointed one, will make it to Canberra given that Kevin has sussed that there’s as much chance of a Labor candidate winning the seat as Obama opening the 2016 Olympic Games.

As he sets out on this most honourable of careers he should reflect that although he may immediately be labelled an anonymous smart-arse he has a very popular seat.