“I’m absolutely thrilled that the polls are showing the Christmas Party is currently much more popular than either the Liberal orLabor Party. And furthermore we’ve become much more popular than the Cocktail Party because we don’t mind as much if people get pissed at parties.The fact that we’re even less popular than One Nation among Middle Eastern immigrants seems grossly unfair because ‘goodwill to all men’ is one of our core policies.
Surprisingly leaders of other parties like Malcolm and Bill are seen more as real people than me but I’m the only one who gets invited to do a six-week goodwill gig at David Jones. And while the Christmas Party only generates active support for one month every year the other parties only manage it once every three years at election time. Merry Christmas.
In a heart-warming article in the famous Friday Mash Whogivesashit series world leaders reveal exclusively their innermost feelings about Christmas and whether they truly giveashit about it or not.