As Karl Rove sat at his desk devising another diabolical Republican strategy, a flash of light streaked across the sky, slipped in through the building entrance and came to rest beside him.

Was it a shooting star or a drone straying off course?

No it was Palinpower.

‘Hi Karl’ said Palinpower ‘what’s all this you’ve been saying about me not being a suitable candidate for president, that I lack gravitas?’

‘You gave me a real fright Palinpower’ said Karl ‘why don’t you give me a ring or make an appointment like everybody else?’

‘Because this can’t wait Karl’ said Palinpower ‘and there’s a longer queue to get a date with you than with George Clooney’

‘Look’ said Karl ‘its like this. People expect certain things of a president like leadership, inspiration and the embodiment of all things that are great about this country. You have some great qualities like you’re a Republican but you come up a bit short on the overall presidential checklist’

‘Oh I see’ said Palinpower ‘you believe the country needs someone with the moral values of Bill Clinton’

‘Well no, not exactly’ said Karl

‘Or perhaps’ said Palinpower ‘the country needs a president with the propensity of George Bush Senior to bequeath it things like George Bush Junior’

‘Hold on a minute’ said Karl ‘I must…………….’

‘I’ve just realised’ said Palinpower ‘that I lack the gravitas of someone like Ronald Reagan who starred in B movies’

‘That’s better’ said Karl ‘than starring in a reality TV show’

‘Oh really’ said Palinpower ‘I’m on at prime time on a top rating channel while Ron’s on classic movies at around 3am’

‘You could be a bit more like George W Bush’ said Karl

‘I know’ said Palinpower ‘but there’s no country I feel like invading just at the moment’

‘You need to surround yourself with a formidable team’ said Karl ‘that will stop at nothing to ensure your presidency’

‘Oh’ said Palinpower ‘you mean like Richard Nixon and the plumbers’

‘What I’m saying’ said Karl ‘is that you need to be a Republican more in the mould of Newt Gingrich and Mitt Romney’

‘Are you serious’ asked Palinpower ‘you want me to be more like people who have failed to get the job previously?’

‘Ok’ said Karl ‘I’m sure you’d be a better president than Obama, who wouldn’t be, but what do you think you can offer America?’

‘I’ve never been involved in a political sex scandal’ said Palinpower ‘my kids are not yet old enough to have stuffed the country, I attract huge TV audiences, I haven’t started a war and I haven’t burgled any Democratic Party offices’

‘But you still need gravitas’ said Karl

‘What do you recommend then’ asked Palinpower ‘an affair or a burglary?’

With that she was gone in a flash leaving Karl to ponder whether it would be preferable if she became a community organiser instead.