As John McCain was working at his desk in Washington a flash of light streaked across the skies above and came to rest beside him.

Was it a trillionaire fleeing Obama’s tax hikes or the debt ceiling gone feral? No it was Palinpower.

‘Oh hi Palinpower’ said John ‘great to see you again. Is this a flying visit?’

‘Yes’ said Palinpower ‘it takes too long to come by taxi. I need some good advice’

‘Don’t we all’ said John ‘I wish I’d had better advice during my campaign for president especially about the selection of my running mate’

‘It’s now or never’ said Palinpower ‘for me and the presidency. I’ve got to make up my mind about running in the next week or two and frankly I’m in a bit of a dither over it’

‘It’s a tough decision’ said John ‘Tell me what’s that new biography going to say about you?’

‘It’s going to claim’ said Palinpower ‘that I’m into drugs, sex and shopping and sulking’

‘Well that should help’ said John ‘but of course there’s a lot more to being president than just those things’

‘That’s the problem’ said Palinpower ‘My grasp of politics in the US is a bit inconsistent and don’t even bother to ask me about anything anywhere else’

‘I’d have to agree with that’ said John ‘although it may be a little over optimistic’

‘But you selected me as your running mate’ said Palinpower ‘What were my special qualities that attracted you?’

‘You weren’t carrying any baggage’ said John ‘which is of course more than I can say about you now’

‘But I galvanised the nation’ said Palinpower ‘with my campaign to restore America’s honor’

‘After that book comes out’ said John ‘you’ll need a major campaign to restore your own honor’

‘When you take along hard look at the current crop of Republican candidates’ said Palinpower ‘something’s missing. Perry, Romney, Bachmann and the rest don’t have that X factor, that certain something that screams out ‘I’m the next US president’’

‘You mean like George W Bush?’ asked John

‘No I mean like Obama’ said Palinpower

‘That’s it’ cried John ‘that’s your problem, you’re too like Obama and look how he’s turned out. That’s why people are afraid you’ll be a disaster as well’

‘But you were the one who lit my fire’ said Palinpower ‘it was you who inspired me to believe I could lead this nation back to greatness’

‘Yes well’ said John ‘we all make mistakes’

With that Palinpower was gone in a flash leaving John to ponder whether he’d have become president if he’d selected Scooby Doo as his running mate instead.